Expert in Group of San Ramon Psychologists and Psychotherapists Discusses Staying Hopeful
Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) looks at our thoughts, feelings, core beliefs, and responses to the key events that happen to or around us each day. As individuals, we tend to live in a chronic state of anger and rage, depression, or chronic anxiety. How we feel is a direct reflection of our thoughts and beliefs about those events. Our personal reaction clocks are set with diverse speeds as unique and individual as we are. We frequently respond quickly by the fight or flight response when our personal values, triggers, or buttons are pushed.
Of critical impact are the cognitive distortions: Filtering, Shoulds, Catastrophizing, Black or White thinking, etc., that drive our pattern of thinking. Filtering is like an oil filter that filters out the bad oil from the good oil. For many, we filter out all the positive – or clean oil – and focus only, or primarily, on the negative. Frequently our thoughts lead us to conclusions of how we believe things “should” be, which may come into direct opposition to other’s values or beliefs, or even pushing ourselves into a state of unrealistic perfectionism. Other times everything is a disaster; if the cake doesn’t rise like it should, the whole meal is destroyed. In black or white thinking things are either/or where there is no middle ground, such as “If I fail once I always fail, or bad things always happen to me.“ When we use these distortions we are much more tended toward negative responses, such as lashing out in anger, feeling keyed up and anxious, or isolating in a state of depression.
Our Bay Area Online Therapy Practice Is Here To Help
Looking forward, the holidays are a time to come together with family and friends to celebrate, share remembrances, engage in family traditions, all while creating new memories. For the remainder of this year, may we each commit to avoiding the traps of our negative thinking patterns or cognitive distortions. May we seek solutions to problems and find the positives in ourselves and each other, all while not being afraid to call upon the aid of professionals in family and couples counseling. May we be less critical, love more, and instill hope in our future and our world.
